This will be a quick post. I’m exhausted. I hiked a little today, walked around the mall a little, climbed (and fell off) a rock wall bouldering, and ate intuitively. All these things (especially the last) make me tired.
I am on a two day pass with my mother, which I was terrified would be HORRIBLE, but has actually turned out to be pretty decent. I was most concerned about eating, but I seem to be handling that fairly well. Actually, I haven’t had a snack tonight, but I had two snacks before dinner, so I’m feeling pretty okay with it. I’m not really all that hungry.
Did you catch that? I’m basing what I eat and when I eat based on hunger, not some stupid eating disordered rules. I ate two pieces of spinach artichoke pizza tonight, followed by two slices of berry dessert pizza, and felt just fine about it. I have my swim suit here at the hotel, so I could have gone to work it all off, but decided I am exhausted and just wanted to lay in bed and fall asleep ASAP.
After writing this post, of course, to tell you all that I love you and miss you and I don’t even have words to explain how bizarre these past few months have been, but I am in such a good place.
I want recovery.
I deserve it.
I am owning it and doing it.
Back to regularly scheduled posts and updates on August 3, when I rejoin the real world. (Or, as I like to say, when they release me into the wild!)