Welcome to DAY ONE of my week-long attempt to blog everyday.
Also known as my “week-long therapy assignment to attempt to feel accomplishment at something other than starving and exercise.”
While my counselor is not so naive as to think that simply feeling “accomplished” at something outside of my eating disorder will miraculously cure me, she does think that throwing some of the energy I usually spend on my disorder into other pursuits will go a long way to helping me rediscover who I am, what I like, and that I actually have talents and interests outside of food and exercise. Who knew?!
So, each day, a friend is going to provide me with a writing prompt that I’ll complete. If you want to join in on giving me prompts, please do! Leave a comment with a question you want me to answer, a topic you’d like to hear my opinion on, whatever. I would love to begin expanding my blog topics beyond whining about my meal plan. I’m sure you, as my readers, would love that, too.
Today’s prompt: The Serenity Prayer
If you’re a twelve-stepper or, I imagine, a human being in America who has ever been in a cheesy gift shop, you are familiar with at least the first stanza of the Serenity Prayer by Reinhold Niebuhr: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. My friend challenged me to write out the Serenity Prayer and expand it: what are the things I cannot change, what things can I change, where do I need wisdom?
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
- I am a woman
- I have emotions
- I have physical, emotional, and spiritual needs
- Recovery means gaining and maintaining weight
- My family is my family – period
- I have been abused and neglected in my past
- People may perceive me poorly
- I do not know the future
- I failed a class in college
…the courage to change the things I can
- How I react to my family
- How I present myself to the world
- How I deal with stress
- Eating properly to fuel my body
- Working through my past to make sure past abuse doesn’t cause future problems
- Making strides to become the woman I want to be
- How I spend my free time (in reading, prayer, or worship)
…and the wisdom to know the difference
such as the differences:
- between vigilance and obsession
- between running because it feels good and running because I want to hurt myself
- between healthy acceptance of circumstances and feeling defeated or giving up
- between helpful self-reflection and crazy-making navel-gazing
- between genuinely not enjoying the taste of a food and not enjoying a food because it has such strong emotional ties
What do you think, friends? Did I miss anything? What differences have you had to learn in your recovery process? I genuinely want to know!